April 22nd, 2008

4-22-08
Time To Chuckle
By: Jerry Barnhart

Time to wet a line…
These two North Dakotans rented a fishing boat and, in their first anchored spot, caught 30 Iowa Walleyes (sorry, 30 bullheads).
“We need to mark this spot so we can come here tomorrow,” the first man said.
His friend replied, “Great idea. How about I put a big ‘X’ on the bottom of this boat.”
The first man agrees, “Right, then we could find it. But hold up – what if we don’t rent this boat?”

Fishing west of St. Cloud on the Sauk River Chain…my son, Norm, and I pulled up to the dock. Another resort visitor asked if we had any luck.
“Oh yes,” I replied, as we unloaded our gear.”
“But I don’t see any fish in your bucket. ‘Get any strikes?”
“Just a small on eon a daredevil. Oh yes, and lots of luck with great weather, good company and fantastic scenery.” (True!)

Some odd signs from England
* In a London department store: “Bargain Basement… Upstairs.”
* In an office: “Would the person who took the stepladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps WILL be taken.”
* Outside the second-hand shop: “We exchange anything: bicycles, washing machines, et. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.”
* On a repair shop door: “We can repair anything (Please knock HARD on the door. The bell doesn’t work.”

This Yoke Pollutes
Very early on morning, two birds are sitting at the side of a large puddle of oil. They see a big worm on the other side. So, one flies over and the other swims through… Which one gets to the worm first?
The one who swam, of course “Da, oily boid gets the woim.”

The Wind came up on Mille “Lacks”…while the two Supreme Court justices were out fishing. (what else!)
One became seasick. “Can I do anything for you,” asked the other.
“Yes,” replied the sick one with a gasp, “Overrule the motion!”

Now a toast (roast) to all who wet a line
Here’s to our fisherman brave,
Here’s to the fish he caught,
Here’s to the ones that got away,
And here’s to the ones he bought!
(more next week)

In honor of Secretary/Administrative Assistant Day, April 23rd
The boss asked his secretary/administrative assistant: “What do you think we should do about the ignorance and apathy around here?”
The secretary answered: “I don’t know, and I don’t care!”
(Thanks to Bob Martin of Rochester for the joke).

Sharing Appreciation is a wonderful thing: it makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” – Voltaire


Have a joke for Jerry? Send us your favorite joke and Jerry will choose his favorite for publication. Send jokes to:

Attn: Time To Chuckle
The Rochester Buyer’s Guide & Community News
515 Rocky Creek Dr. NE
Rochester, MN 55906

‘Time To Chuckle’ contributor, Jerry Barnhart, is the founder & producer of “Vet’s Visits” on T.V. “Vet’s Visits” airs Monday through Sunday 6-8 am & Monday through Thursday at 6 pm on Cable Access Channel 10 in Rochester.