April 29th, 2008

4-29-08
Time To Chuckle
By: Jerry Barnhart

Yeah Team…Fight!!
Coach: (to young player) “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?”
Child Player: “Yes, Coach.”
Coach: “When a strike is called out at first, you don’t argue, curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand that?”
Child: “Yes.”
Coach: “Good, now go over and explain it to your mother.”

Dog Gone Shame
The man takes his dog into the movie theatre. It’s a romantic comedy and whenever there’s a funny scene the dog starts laughing. Later, there’s a sad part and suddenly the dog starts crying. This goes on throughout the entire film. A man sitting nearby witnessed the dog’s actions and decides to follow them out after the movie.
In the foyer, he approaches the dog’s owner and says, “That’s truly amazing. your dog seemed to understand the whole plot!”
“It sure is,” the dog-owner replied, “he hated the book.”

A duck went to a local store
to buy chapstick, and the clerk asked if he would pay cash and the duck said, no, just put it on my bill.

It’s just a a man thing
A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of the study: “Duh.”
and…
“Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection,” she stated. “My husband forgot the code to turn off the house alarm. When the police came, he wouldn’t admit he’d forgotten the code. He turned himself in.”
and…
My personal motto is: “If it ain’t broke, you can probably still fix it.”

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson… were camping in their tent. They had been asleep beneath the night sky when Holmes suddenly awoke and shook his friend.
“Watson, look at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions of brilliant stars,” said Watson.
“And what does that tell you?”
“Astronomically, it tells me that there are countless galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, I see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. And you Holmes?
Holmes paused. “What I see Watson… is that someone has stolen our tent!”


Have a joke for Jerry? Send us your favorite joke and Jerry will choose his favorite for publication. Send jokes to:

Attn: Time To Chuckle
The Rochester Buyer’s Guide & Community News
515 Rocky Creek Dr. NE
Rochester, MN 55906

‘Time To Chuckle’ contributor, Jerry Barnhart, is the founder & producer of “Vet’s Visits” on T.V. “Vet’s Visits” airs Monday through Sunday 6-8 am & Monday through Thursday at 6 pm on Cable Access Channel 10 in Rochester.